Governor of Uranus.

They New Mexico governors race is starting to heat up

in case you didn't notice.

Im sure you didn't.

Well, maybe it's not.

It might actually may be just in the starting stages.

I guess I don't really know!

The radio said something about it and I figured I could file some paper work to run for the head hancho of New Mexico.

Due to my social standing and political genius I will make a great candidate, all I need is the support from this station and viewers like you.( A little PBS feel)

VOTE FOR ME!

I can assure you that I can make this great land a even better place to live and work.

Lets us start with the basics:

FREE BIKES FOR ALL

I will make it into law that anyone wanting a bike can have one..

No fixed gears.

Those will be illegal.

Everyone needs a bike so that when the alien invasion comes in 2016,

we can all strap our bikes to our cars and when the cars run out of gas the bikes will help us get to Nevada to destroy area 51 for holding secrets about are intergalactic demise.

( Was that a run sentence?)

GAY MARRIAGE FOR ALL

Do you think I give a damn if Bert and Ernie get married?!

I don't.

Theirs no harm in with two people being in love.

Let the gays get married.

They can have all the benefits of modern straight marriages including but not limited to :

Divorce, child support, broken homes, spousal abuse, sometimes depression and much much more.

You never know though, Mr. and Mrs. Thelma and Louise could one day set the golden standard for married life and give us all something to aim for in a successful marriage.

Nothing wrong with that...

Plus girls kissing girls is awesome.

HIPPIE STREET CORNER SHOWER HOUSES.

If you find a Hippie wreaking of patchouly, B.O. and weed, "suggest" him or her to a H.S.C.S.H.

I say "suggest" because as governor I will not force anyone to do anything thats against there human right.

But if you through one of these bums in the shower I can assure you all will be well.

FAIR TAXES!

Rich people pay a little bit more, but not to much.

Middle class pays an average amount.

Lower class pays small amount but not to little.

Some Goldie locks and the three bears shit on that...

Maybe.

Fair?!

Good.

Pizza and burritos will be our co-state food.

It's fair to say that 80% of us eat this god food once a week.

I'll die with a pizza in one hand, a burrito in the other hand and my peter in the other hand..

And on that note I'll wrap it up tomorrow night.

GOOD NIGHT NOW